FRIENDSHIPS AHHH

Hi everyone, so on Thursday and Friday, I didn’t post anything. On Thursday, I had to write ten pages for Friday, and I had to skip supporting my friend in a school performance. So I was pretty upset about that. I did hang out with them at the school, though, until 5:30, when I decided I had to leave. Until then, a number of things had been going on. I was hanging out with my friends, and I don’t really remember what happened, but I felt tired. Lately, “tired” and “sad” have become the same word in my vocabulary.

Anyway, I was tired, and I took a walk to the bathroom with a friend who isn’t really a part of my friend group. I remember telling her what happened, and I remember her telling me, “Your friends kind of put you down.”

Heather wasn’t there, but I need to come up with names for my other friends: Belle, Alice, Meg, Wendy, and Ariel (I’m a big Disney fan).

I told Alice, “I thought the problem was only Meg, but I think it might be Wendy, too.”

I’d had problems with Meg in the past, and she wasn’t the nicest person ever. I’d tried to separate myself from her, but that would mean separating from Belle, Wendy, Ariel, and Heather, too.

I went on, “Wendy has told me she doesn’t really like how Meg treats people, including herself, but acts just like her when they’re together. And when I’m the target, it becomes two-on-one.”

“Yeah, I noticed that, too, and I’m not even friends with them,” Alice said.

We talked a lot, and basically, we came to one conclusion: I had to fully and successfully separate myself from Meg.

So I kind of spent the rest of my time there avoiding Meg and Wendy, walking Alice to a different room and hanging out there for a bit. At one point, Belle came to find me and we talked about everything I talked about with Alice. She was supportive, but Meg didn’t bother her, so she didn’t really know what to do or say to comfort me. She’s a great friend, though.

Then, “Dan”, one of my favorite teachers, approached me and asked if I was okay, and I told him yes. He said that I still seemed my optimistic self, but more stressed and tired. Tired=sad.

I went home after that, walking with Belle to the subway, to go home and write ten pages (eight for one research paper, two for another), because I’m a terrible procrastinator. I went to bed at 2, and woke up at 6 to finish what was left.

The next day, Friday, yesterday, I talked with him after school. For like forty-five minutes. About it all. And he told me the same thing Alice did: that I have to separate myself from Meg. He said that on paper, I could still be friends with her, but to limit my contact with her. He said that Heather and I should break off from the group entirely, because Meg was bullying us both.

So, yesterday, I avoided Meg, which wasn’t very hard because I’d realized I’d been doing that for some time, and I had other friends than in my friend group, so I was fine. I came home, and had a family dinner. It was nice. We had guests. My neighbor/friend was there. It was relieving. It was my last day of classes for the first semester! I have two finals next week, and then a week off. I’m feeling better. Everyone left around 11, and by 11:30, I was ready for bed, which is why I didn’t post yesterday, either.

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almostanaddict

I'm a teenage girl with brown hair living in NYC who likes to blog about all my issues! Woot woot!

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